Before You Say, “I Do”

Maximum Marriage Series

Building Your Best Marriage, Together

Before You Say, “I Do”

Three types of people need this sermon:

Singles - One of the fastest-growing segments of our church is single adults. In fact, how many of you are currently not married? Look around; your future spouse may be around you right now! :) The bible has a lot to say to the unmarried person; there is a right way and a wrong way to be single. Some of you have never been married - some wish to be, others are delightfully content in singleness. Some are single again, either from divorce or the death of a spouse. Well, this message is for you!

Parents of Singles - One of the most important responsibilities a parent has is preparing a son or a daughter for marriage. The Christian wedding ceremony has a part where the minister asks, ”Who gives this woman to this man?” That is another way to say - who should we look for if it only lasts about 3 weeks? Did you know that in the Old Testament, if a young woman cheated on her husband and was unfaithful? They would stone her to death at the threshold of her Father’s home. Why? Because it was the Parent's responsibility to train their children in how to live in the context of marriage healthily.

Married Couples Who Began Wrong - I have found that most of the issues that lead a couple into marriage counseling began long before they were married. Before you can solve the problems you are facing, you need to go back and address a few things from your courtship. You see, some of us began bad habits in our dating years and they are haunting us today.You see, there are a few things that need to be in place before you say, “I do.” Julie and I were encouraged by our home church to attend 12 sessions of Pre-Engagement counseling. You see, there were questions we didn’t know to ask. There were disciplines we didn’t know would be important. I hope to provide some of that to you through this series.

Consider also people are staying single longer:

In 2023, the median age for first marriages was 30.2 years for men and 28.4 years for women.

This reflects a significant increase from 1956, when the median ages were 22.5 for men and 20.1 for women.

Marriage rates have also experienced a decline. In 2021, the U.S. marriage rate was 14.9 marriages per 1,000 women aged 15 and older, down from 16.3 a decade earlier.

This trend indicates that not only are people marrying later in life, but fewer individuals are choosing to marry overall. Thus, it has become more important than ever that Churches speak directly to the unique challenges of single adults as well as educate Christ's followers on the specific scriptural instructions that apply only to singles.

You may be surprised to know that the Bible has much to say on the subject. Why? Well, because, this is where you should be thinking through the kind of single life you want to live and because this is where you are in the best frame of mind to hear what God has to say.

You see - there are two people that you are wasting your time to counsel:

An Alcoholic when he’s three sheets to the wind

And a single person when they are in love. It’s too late, then.

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Maximum Life is the Media Ministry of Pastor Zach Terry.

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